Sometimes these winter mornings leave me a little lacklustre and searching for that kick start, a moment of sunshine and heat to ignite my creative fire for the day. These dark, cold mornings have never really agreed with me, so when Tallow and I wave goodbye to Ben each morning, I must admit to breathing a sigh of relief that we can hang out it our pajamas for a while longer (sometimes a long while) and take the mornings slowly. Some days I notice my mind wandering, as I boil the kettle or wash the dishes, wishing for an extra hour to myself and a uninterrupted cup of tea. It's so easy to live in the past, wishing that everyone had a good night's sleep, wondering how the washing pile got so high. It's even easier to live in the future, in the hope of a long morning nap, daydreaming about the weekend, writing endless to dos. The hard part is being in the present, letting it all go, the lists, the washing, the lack of sleep.. to just be.
The present is raw and open to all possibilities. It hasn't had the opportunity to be 'touched up' by the mind, it hasn't digressed off the path, it's right there and some days it can be a little daunting, especially when it's cold and foggy and it's so much easier to huddle up by the heater and daydream. I've realised though, it's in the mindful present, that those wonderful sparks of creativity, energy and purpose (the really good stuff) are to be found, ironically the very same sparks I'm most often daydreaming about.
So this week, I've made a promise to myself.. to embrace the cliches and live in the moment. I've given up my list making, opened the blinds early to catch every drop of morning sunshine and just dived straight into our days. I've let the hours unfold without watching the clock, played, read (mostly 'That's not my Fairy/Bunny/Mermaid/Tiger') giggled and danced, captured creative opportunities when they appeared and perhaps most importantly, I've stopped worrying at 6pm about where the day has gone.
And I know it's so easy to slip into old patterns, to worry about things I can't change, get swept away in tomorrow's plans and to scroll through social media feeling like I'm not keeping up. But know when I do, I remind myself to stop, to let the feeling go and come back to the present, to the moment that really counts.